Tagjenbim is a god.

It takes the form of a corpulent, sapient lizard.

Tagjenbim created an atom four quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Tagjenbim, it will make you lucky.

If you do not believe in Tagjenbim, it will destroy your favourite planet.

Tagjenbim's most sacred site is Krina in Germany.

Tagjenbim's Holy Commandments

1. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

2. Never play with disobedient children.

3. Doves are not to be trusted.

4. Feed all hungry nematodes.

5. Always obey Tagjenbim's priests.