Spagtafwat is a god.

She takes the form of an one thousand metre long, caring pig.

Spagtafwat created the Sombrero Galaxy eight trillion years ago.

If you believe in Spagtafwat, she will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Spagtafwat, she will curse you and those you beget for fifty two trillion years.

Spagtafwat's most sacred site is Crugybar in Wales.

Spagtafwat's Holy Commandments

1. Draw representations of black holes on the walls of your dwelling place.

2. Never mention tortoises.

3. Always obey Spagtafwat's priests.

4. Always pray in complete darkness.

5. Never chant near frogs.