Stiplargveg is a god.

It takes the form of a six thousand metre long, selfish monkey.

Stiplargveg created time and space seven million years ago.

If you believe in Stiplargveg, it will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Stiplargveg, it will turn you into a snail.

Stiplargveg's most sacred site is Daraina in Madagascar.

Stiplargveg's Holy Commandments

1. Worship no other gods but Stiplargveg.

2. Always make a point of helping unfortunate seals.

3. Never think about comets.

4. Hide from brown moths for they are unholy.

5. Never paint your hands fawn.