Wankapgid is a god.

It takes the form of a chunky, witty tapir.

Wankapgid created Asia eight thousand years ago.

If you believe in Wankapgid, it will celebrate by creating some planets.

If you do not believe in Wankapgid, it will be very unhappy.

Wankapgid's most sacred site is Mogonono in Botswana.

Wankapgid's Holy Commandments

1. Pray towards the west.

2. Always stare at clouds.

3. Never eat bark.

4. Always take life seriously.

5. Never feed lentils to moths while wearing turquoise tights.