Betstragcem is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely large, fussy lion.

Betstragcem created life two quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Betstragcem, it will approve.

If you do not believe in Betstragcem, it will refuse to believe in you.

Betstragcem's most sacred site is Xtul in Mexico.

Betstragcem's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about ribonucleic acid.

2. Erect nine silver sculptures of Betstragcem on top of important buildings.

3. Never talk about fire.

4. Fast once a month.

5. Do not wear blue clothing.