Mabwabfom is a god.

He takes the form of a planet-sized, emotional rhinoceros.

Mabwabfom created light nine quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Mabwabfom, he will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Mabwabfom, he will turn you into a mouse.

Mabwabfom's most sacred site is Hongcun in China.

Mabwabfom's Holy Commandments

1. Never skip near squirrels.

2. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

3. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

4. Never think about dark energy.

5. Always look after injured geese.