Teenhen Kadsagsak is a god.

He takes the form of a very fat, contented dingo.

Teenhen Kadsagsak created a photon five thousand years ago.

If you believe in Teenhen Kadsagsak, he will not care.

If you do not believe in Teenhen Kadsagsak, he will turn you into an amoeba.

Teenhen Kadsagsak's most sacred site is Borolong in Botswana.

Teenhen Kadsagsak's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat peanuts.

2. Do not covet oxen.

3. Ducks are not to be trusted.

4. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

5. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Teenhen Kadsagsak.