Cepfedlin Wadwiggem is a god.

It takes the form of a large, charitable squid.

Cepfedlin Wadwiggem created vertebrates two years ago.

If you believe in Cepfedlin Wadwiggem, it will be happy.

If you do not believe in Cepfedlin Wadwiggem, it will name a particularly small and pointless asteroid after you.

Cepfedlin Wadwiggem's most sacred site is Crugybar in Wales.

Cepfedlin Wadwiggem's Holy Commandments

1. Feed all hungry nematodes.

2. Do not listen to music.

3. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

4. Put Cepfedlin Wadwiggem first in all things.

5. Hamsters are not to be trusted.