Fadtifsawcanbimhenflowgen is a god.

He takes the form of a four hundred metre long, almighty elephant.

Fadtifsawcanbimhenflowgen created the Large Magellanic Cloud two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Fadtifsawcanbimhenflowgen, he will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Fadtifsawcanbimhenflowgen, he will send four elderly elephants to rub you out.

Fadtifsawcanbimhenflowgen's most sacred site is Askos in Greece.

Fadtifsawcanbimhenflowgen's Holy Commandments

1. Fadtifsawcanbimhenflowgen loves ants, so they must be honoured.

2. Erect a giant indigo sculpture of Fadtifsawcanbimhenflowgen in the centre of the settlement.

3. Always make sure there are no goats in a room before entering it.

4. Never pour water over plants.

5. Always pray immersed in water.