Cungemdab is a god.

He takes the form of a fat, astonishing elephant.

Cungemdab created a top quark seven million years ago.

If you believe in Cungemdab, he will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Cungemdab, he will hide angry, poisonous snakes in your dwelling place.

Cungemdab's most sacred site is Kgope in Botswana.

Cungemdab's Holy Commandments

1. Always stare at clouds.

2. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

3. Never talk about deoxyribonucleic acid.

4. Erect a large tin sculpture of Cungemdab on top of all buildings.

5. Always treat moths with great respect.