Xenkipfidgam is a god.

She takes the form of a nine hundred metre long, narcissistic fairy.

Xenkipfidgam created dark energy two million years ago.

If you believe in Xenkipfidgam, she will be happy.

If you do not believe in Xenkipfidgam, she will send you a strongly worded letter.

Xenkipfidgam's most sacred site is Katballe in Denmark.

Xenkipfidgam's Holy Commandments

1. Do not speak about cherries.

2. Do not keep six rats in a large pit.

3. You must pray to Xenkipfidgam five times a day.

4. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

5. Your children must be taught to worship Xenkipfidgam.