Yarlcebgig is a god.

He takes the form of a nine thousand metre long, narcissistic lizard.

Yarlcebgig created the planet Mars four trillion years ago.

If you believe in Yarlcebgig, he will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Yarlcebgig, he will throw large rocks at you.

Yarlcebgig's most sacred site is Embalam in India.

Yarlcebgig's Holy Commandments

1. Never feed parsnips to shrews while wearing blue boots.

2. Do not fashion models of living things.

3. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

4. Respect your elders.

5. Never hurt bats.