Flaggammob is a god.

She takes the form of a giant, confident crocodile.

Flaggammob created the planet Earth seven billion years ago.

If you believe in Flaggammob, she will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Flaggammob, she will insist you be burnt at the stake.

Flaggammob's most sacred site is Camon in France.

Flaggammob's Holy Commandments

1. Erect a large zinc sculpture of Flaggammob on top of all buildings.

2. Never play with disobedient children.

3. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

4. Do not drink alcohol.

5. Do not speak about gooseberries.