Naknutt Quillkarlin is a god.

He takes the form of an enormous, stupid bee.

Naknutt Quillkarlin created a charm quark twelve years ago.

If you believe in Naknutt Quillkarlin, he will give you the power of flight.

If you do not believe in Naknutt Quillkarlin, he will turn you into a giant slug.

Naknutt Quillkarlin's most sacred site is Letino in Italy.

Naknutt Quillkarlin's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat bark.

2. Retreat if five whales approach from the east.

3. Do not fashion models of living things.

4. Run away from indigo mites, for they are unholy.

5. Never feed tomatoes to aardvarks while wearing purple dresses.