Fenmanafhim Rullfitsak is a god.

It takes the form of an one thousand metre long, tiresome tapir.

Fenmanafhim Rullfitsak created everything that exists three hundred thousand years ago.

If you believe in Fenmanafhim Rullfitsak, it will give you the power of flight.

If you do not believe in Fenmanafhim Rullfitsak, it will attempt to scare you with earthquakes.

Fenmanafhim Rullfitsak's most sacred site is Olmarch in Wales.

Fenmanafhim Rullfitsak's Holy Commandments

1. Your children must be taught to worship Fenmanafhim Rullfitsak.

2. Look mercifully on unfortunate doves.

3. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

4. Never feed lots of rice to tapirs while wearing yellow ear rings.

5. Pray towards the south.