Tentalcet is a god.

It takes the form of a six thousand metre long, ill-tempered ferret.

Tentalcet created water eight trillion years ago.

If you believe in Tentalcet, it will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Tentalcet, it will turn you into a dog.

Tentalcet's most sacred site is Poloka in Botswana.

Tentalcet's Holy Commandments

1. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

2. Never talk about ribonucleic acid.

3. Never eat green fruit.

4. Always make a point of helping unfortunate whales.

5. Never hop in the presence of shrews.