Honsitnar is a god.

He takes the form of a nine hundred metre long, witty wren.

Honsitnar created the world four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Honsitnar, he will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Honsitnar, he will turn you into a slug.

Honsitnar's most sacred site is Manja in Madagascar.

Honsitnar's Holy Commandments

1. Run away from yellow mites, for they are unholy.

2. Honsitnar loves mice, so they must be honoured.

3. Never feed beans to ducks while wearing boots.

4. Never eat coconuts.

5. Do not listen to heathen tongues.