Carvonkquim is a god.

He takes the form of a nine thousand metre long, astonishing finch.

Carvonkquim created the Virgo Supercluster six trillion years ago.

If you believe in Carvonkquim, he will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Carvonkquim, he will turn you into a tree.

Carvonkquim's most sacred site is Insel in Germany.

Carvonkquim's Holy Commandments

1. Never look in ponds.

2. Always make sure there are no capybaras in a room before entering it.

3. Never think about cell theory.

4. Never feed grapes to grasshopers while wearing violet tights.

5. Do not stand on grass.