Nakbodlat is a god.

He takes the form of a very large, proud penguin.

Nakbodlat created Europe seven thousand years ago.

If you believe in Nakbodlat, he will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Nakbodlat, he will turn you into a sheep.

Nakbodlat's most sacred site is Buskerud in Norway.

Nakbodlat's Holy Commandments

1. Always pray in complete darkness.

2. Nakbodlat must be the most important thing in your life.

3. Do not speak about onions.

4. Never wear blue tights.

5. Always look both ways before crossing roads.