Nurlpakgid is a god.

He takes the form of a five hundred metre long, impressive monkey.

Nurlpakgid created the Andromeda Galaxy three trillion years ago.

If you believe in Nurlpakgid, he will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Nurlpakgid, he will send two she bears to sort you out.

Nurlpakgid's most sacred site is Kirumampakkam in India.

Nurlpakgid's Holy Commandments

1. Horses are unholy and should not be approached.

2. You must love Nurlpakgid.

3. Respect your elders.

4. Erect a large aluminium sculpture of Nurlpakgid on top of all buildings.

5. You must pray to Nurlpakgid five times a day.