Kartalcub is a god.

She takes the form of a very heavy, bad-tempered ant.

Kartalcub created silver seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Kartalcub, she will be surprised.

If you do not believe in Kartalcub, she will send you a strongly worded letter.

Kartalcub's most sacred site is Issigeac in France.

Kartalcub's Holy Commandments

1. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

2. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

3. Always make a point of helping unfortunate turtles.

4. Never look at black holes.

5. Do not stand on grass.