Teenlittoftit is a god.

She takes the form of a very thin, temperamental gerbil.

Teenlittoftit created the cosmos three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Teenlittoftit, she will give you the power of flight.

If you do not believe in Teenlittoftit, she will throw large rocks at you.

Teenlittoftit's most sacred site is Sirama in Madagascar.

Teenlittoftit's Holy Commandments

1. Retreat if six turtles approach from the east.

2. Do not drink from vessels made of nickel.

3. Do not commit murder.

4. Erect a giant cyan sculpture of Teenlittoftit in the centre of the settlement.

5. Put Teenlittoftit first in all things.