Wancetkad is a god.

It takes the form of a large, omnipotent manatee.

Wancetkad created life four million years ago.

If you believe in Wancetkad, it will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Wancetkad, it will turn you into a sheep.

Wancetkad's most sacred site is Insel in Germany.

Wancetkad's Holy Commandments

1. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

2. Always help mites.

3. Never pour water over plants.

4. Never paint your head fawn.

5. Never talk about eagles.