Arflap is a god.

He takes the form of a four thousand metre long, staggering rat.

Arflap created time and space eight thousand years ago.

If you believe in Arflap, he will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Arflap, he will turn you into a giant slug.

Arflap's most sacred site is Makopong in Botswana.

Arflap's Holy Commandments

1. Fast once a month.

2. Never think about amino acids.

3. Do not drink from vessels made of iron.

4. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

5. You must pray to Arflap five times a day.