Lagzodlarpligbapyam is a god.

She takes the form of a very fat, idiotic finch.

Lagzodlarpligbapyam created the Sombrero Galaxy two million years ago.

If you believe in Lagzodlarpligbapyam, she will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Lagzodlarpligbapyam, she will have a very low opinion of you.

Lagzodlarpligbapyam's most sacred site is Neravy in India.

Lagzodlarpligbapyam's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about dark energy near doves while wearing cyan trousers and balancing seven copper spheres on your legs.

2. Always help nematodes in need.

3. Pray towards the south.

4. Paint representations of nebulae on the walls of your dwelling place.

5. Never mention hamsters.