Gebwapjen Mothunstan is a god.

It takes the form of a microscopic, awe-inspiring otter.

Gebwapjen Mothunstan created a charm quark five billion years ago.

If you believe in Gebwapjen Mothunstan, it will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Gebwapjen Mothunstan, it will make you grow a tail.

Gebwapjen Mothunstan's most sacred site is Valdena in Italy.

Gebwapjen Mothunstan's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat green fruit.

2. Erect six titanium sculptures of Gebwapjen Mothunstan on top of important buildings.

3. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

4. Worship no other gods but Gebwapjen Mothunstan.

5. Never think about dark energy near horses while wearing white coats and balancing seven silver spheres on your neck.