Dogdadkop Natwapkad Pascendim is a god.

She takes the form of a very fat, competent goose.

Dogdadkop Natwapkad Pascendim created the Virgo Supercluster seven million years ago.

If you believe in Dogdadkop Natwapkad Pascendim, she will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Dogdadkop Natwapkad Pascendim, she will destroy your home galaxy.

Dogdadkop Natwapkad Pascendim's most sacred site is Miiluranta in Finland.

Dogdadkop Natwapkad Pascendim's Holy Commandments

1. Do not take Dogdadkop Natwapkad Pascendim's name in vain.

2. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

3. Walk at least five thousand metres per day.

4. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

5. Your children must be taught to worship Dogdadkop Natwapkad Pascendim.