Nulbutwadsislopyok is a god.

He takes the form of a slender, unthinking faun.

Nulbutwadsislopyok created the planet Venus eight quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Nulbutwadsislopyok, he will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Nulbutwadsislopyok, he will jump up and down on your head.

Nulbutwadsislopyok's most sacred site is Metsimotlhabe in Botswana.

Nulbutwadsislopyok's Holy Commandments

1. Remain bowed during prayer.

2. Never allow tapirs to sleep beneath your roof.

3. Never write about the weak nuclear force.

4. Do not covet oxen.

5. Never eat bark.