Sidnadtonk is a god.

It takes the form of a minute, awesome snake.

Sidnadtonk created a top quark three trillion years ago.

If you believe in Sidnadtonk, it will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Sidnadtonk, it will attempt to scare you with floods.

Sidnadtonk's most sacred site is Snipp in Sweden.

Sidnadtonk's Holy Commandments

1. Learn five new languages a year.

2. Never talk about fire.

3. Do not make images of living things.

4. Never paint your hands purple.

5. Do not trade with those who eat aubergines.