Dodtiggeb is a god.

It takes the form of an eight hundred metre long, unthoughtful snake.

Dodtiggeb created the Whirlpool Galaxy seven thousand years ago.

If you believe in Dodtiggeb, it will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Dodtiggeb, it will turn you into a giant slug.

Dodtiggeb's most sacred site is Ringford in Scotland.

Dodtiggeb's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

2. Always look after injured monkeys.

3. Do not chop down trees.

4. Always help geese.

5. Never wear ear rings.