Govtailben is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely small, moody faun.

Govtailben created snails two million years ago.

If you believe in Govtailben, it will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Govtailben, it will have an extremely low opinion of you.

Govtailben's most sacred site is Cusihuiriachi in Mexico.

Govtailben's Holy Commandments

1. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

2. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

3. Always pray immersed in water.

4. Erect a large lead sculpture of Govtailben on top of all buildings.

5. Always look both ways before crossing roads.