Saglopfig is a god.

She takes the form of a three thousand metre long, thoughtless gorilla.

Saglopfig created the Andromeda Galaxy three hundred thousand years ago.

If you believe in Saglopfig, she will be happy.

If you do not believe in Saglopfig, she will send four elephants to rub you out.

Saglopfig's most sacred site is Yerakini in Greece.

Saglopfig's Holy Commandments

1. Do not dye your hair yellow.

2. You must pray to Saglopfig five times a day.

3. Do not take Saglopfig's name in vain.

4. Never go into gray rooms.

5. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.