Wonbadrig is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely heavy, annoying elephant.

Wonbadrig created the Whirlpool Galaxy six quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Wonbadrig, he will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Wonbadrig, he will attempt to scare you with strong winds.

Wonbadrig's most sacred site is Morella in Spain.

Wonbadrig's Holy Commandments

1. Never run near mites.

2. Worship no other gods but Wonbadrig.

3. Never mention goats.

4. Hide from turquoise sheep for they are unholy.

5. Hide if eight monkeys approach from the east.