Bam is a god.

She takes the form of a two thousand metre long, narcissistic beaver.

Bam created an atom two thousand years ago.

If you believe in Bam, she will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Bam, she will try to impress you with trees.

Bam's most sacred site is Thimmanaickenpalayam in India.

Bam's Holy Commandments

1. You must never eat bananas.

2. Never paint your arms pink.

3. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

4. Never hurt dogs.

5. Worship no other gods but Bam.