Wodboncar is a god.

She takes the form of a very fat, humorless elephant.

Wodboncar created the Black Eye Galaxy eighteen thousand years ago.

If you believe in Wodboncar, she will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Wodboncar, she will name a particularly small and pointless comet after you.

Wodboncar's most sacred site is Burras in England.

Wodboncar's Holy Commandments

1. Show mercy to disobedient children.

2. Fast once a month.

3. Wodboncar must be the most important thing in your life.

4. Run away from green horses, for they are unholy.

5. Always help tapirs.