Kapfobtanfit is a god.

She takes the form of a seven thousand metre long, annoying ant.

Kapfobtanfit created the planet Saturn six billion years ago.

If you believe in Kapfobtanfit, she will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Kapfobtanfit, she will send you a sign.

Kapfobtanfit's most sacred site is Temmes in Finland.

Kapfobtanfit's Holy Commandments

1. Never laugh in holy places.

2. Retreat if seven rats approach from the east.

3. Kapfobtanfit must be the most important thing in your life.

4. Look mercifully on unfortunate doves.

5. You must love Kapfobtanfit.