Bastvagvenpogtanlingodarp Dabrotsis Hakteenlin is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely thin, tiresome yak.

Bastvagvenpogtanlingodarp Dabrotsis Hakteenlin created humankind five thousand years ago.

If you believe in Bastvagvenpogtanlingodarp Dabrotsis Hakteenlin, it will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Bastvagvenpogtanlingodarp Dabrotsis Hakteenlin, it will turn you into a rat.

Bastvagvenpogtanlingodarp Dabrotsis Hakteenlin's most sacred site is Glastonbury Tor in England.

Bastvagvenpogtanlingodarp Dabrotsis Hakteenlin's Holy Commandments

1. Show mercy to disobedient children.

2. Never leap in holy places.

3. Always pray in complete darkness.

4. Never think about enzymes.

5. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.