Hassugdit is a god.

She takes the form of a very heavy, omnipotent dugong.

Hassugdit created everything that exists eight million years ago.

If you believe in Hassugdit, she will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Hassugdit, she will be mildly annoyed.

Hassugdit's most sacred site is Oppin in Germany.

Hassugdit's Holy Commandments

1. You must love Hassugdit.

2. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

3. Never feed peanuts to sharks while wearing green trousers.

4. Never eat gooseberries.

5. Do not speak about spinach.