Japlingam is a god.

He takes the form of a six hundred metre long, contented centipede.

Japlingam created a strange quark five billion years ago.

If you believe in Japlingam, he will grant your every wish.

If you do not believe in Japlingam, he will ignore you.

Japlingam's most sacred site is Ringsted in Denmark.

Japlingam's Holy Commandments

1. Always pray in complete darkness.

2. Never eat tomatoes.

3. Never think ill of sick seals.

4. Do not wear red clothing.

5. Respect your elders.