Fidbastdap is a god.

It takes the form of a thin, overgenerous dog.

Fidbastdap created Africa six million years ago.

If you believe in Fidbastdap, it will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Fidbastdap, it will refuse to believe in you.

Fidbastdap's most sacred site is Hongcun in China.

Fidbastdap's Holy Commandments

1. Do not listen to music.

2. Never write about chlorophyll.

3. Never look in ponds.

4. Hide if four doves approach from the north.

5. Do not shave your head.