Maddussxem is a god.

He takes the form of a gargantuan, witless scorpion.

Maddussxem created the Virgo Supercluster two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Maddussxem, he will grant all your wishes.

If you do not believe in Maddussxem, he will curse you and those you beget for all time.

Maddussxem's most sacred site is Cusihuiriachi in Mexico.

Maddussxem's Holy Commandments

1. Learn eight new languages a year.

2. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

3. Paint representations of planets on the walls of your dwelling place in mauve.

4. Do not drink alcohol.

5. Do not cook food in pots.