Ripbifvonk is a god.

She takes the form of a two thousand metre long, calm gorilla.

Ripbifvonk created parasitic wasps four quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Ripbifvonk, she will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Ripbifvonk, she will attempt to scare you with strong winds.

Ripbifvonk's most sacred site is Esse in Finland.

Ripbifvonk's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about evolution by means of natural selection.

2. Never sit in the presence of mice.

3. Paint representations of dwarf planets on the walls of your dwelling place.

4. Ripbifvonk loves badgers, so they must be respected.

5. Always wear blue.