Nelfemwit Pagsterdosskimkopfag is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely large, slow salamander.

Nelfemwit Pagsterdosskimkopfag created Africa four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Nelfemwit Pagsterdosskimkopfag, it will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Nelfemwit Pagsterdosskimkopfag, it will be mildly annoyed.

Nelfemwit Pagsterdosskimkopfag's most sacred site is Faux Cap in Madagascar.

Nelfemwit Pagsterdosskimkopfag's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat green fruit.

2. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

3. Never talk about mice.

4. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

5. Never think about optics near sheep while wearing magenta hats and balancing three aluminium spheres on your back.