Lakxentan is a god.

She takes the form of a very fat, loving troll.

Lakxentan created life seven million years ago.

If you believe in Lakxentan, she will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Lakxentan, she will have an extremely low opinion of you.

Lakxentan's most sacred site is Issigeac in France.

Lakxentan's Holy Commandments

1. Lakxentan loves manatees, so they must be honoured.

2. Never wear stockings.

3. Always help capybaras.

4. Voles are not to be trusted.

5. Do not trade with those who eat parsnips.