Fabbenfedhud Quaflarpgen is a god.

He takes the form of a plump, merciful skunk.

Fabbenfedhud Quaflarpgen created life seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Fabbenfedhud Quaflarpgen, he will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Fabbenfedhud Quaflarpgen, he will attempt to scare you with strong winds.

Fabbenfedhud Quaflarpgen's most sacred site is Paavola in Finland.

Fabbenfedhud Quaflarpgen's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about the weak nuclear force.

2. Pray towards the west.

3. Never mention sharks.

4. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

5. Do not listen to music.