Betfebril is a god.

She takes the form of a small, contented jellyfish.

Betfebril created bats nine million years ago.

If you believe in Betfebril, she will be surprised.

If you do not believe in Betfebril, she will be very sad.

Betfebril's most sacred site is Kgope in Botswana.

Betfebril's Holy Commandments

1. Always make sure there are no monkeys in a room before entering it.

2. Worship no other gods but Betfebril.

3. Never think about solid mechanics near bats while wearing mauve kilts and balancing three titanium spheres on your neck.

4. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

5. Never feed bananas to otters while wearing shorts.