Gattampig is a god.

He takes the form of a giant, bad-tempered mink.

Gattampig created the planet Earth two thousand years ago.

If you believe in Gattampig, he will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Gattampig, he will send minions to preach to you.

Gattampig's most sacred site is Sirama in Madagascar.

Gattampig's Holy Commandments

1. Never feed lots of turnips to ants while wearing violet dresses.

2. Do not wear orange clothing.

3. Do not cook food in pots.

4. Always help moths in need.

5. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.