Rakbanweg Largrowkap Neljarnbug is a god.

It takes the form of a blubbery, fussy otter.

Rakbanweg Largrowkap Neljarnbug created Asia eight trillion years ago.

If you believe in Rakbanweg Largrowkap Neljarnbug, it will give you the power of flight.

If you do not believe in Rakbanweg Largrowkap Neljarnbug, it will turn you into an amoeba.

Rakbanweg Largrowkap Neljarnbug's most sacred site is Gorslas in Wales.

Rakbanweg Largrowkap Neljarnbug's Holy Commandments

1. You must love Rakbanweg Largrowkap Neljarnbug.

2. Never eat bark.

3. Run away if five rats approach from the east.

4. Never bounce in holy places.

5. Never go into orange rooms.