Sitarplam is a god.

He takes the form of a minute, happy zebra.

Sitarplam created the Sol system two quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Sitarplam, he will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Sitarplam, he will destroy your home planet.

Sitarplam's most sacred site is Leswalt in Scotland.

Sitarplam's Holy Commandments

1. Mice are unholy and should not be approached.

2. Always obey Sitarplam's priests.

3. You must never eat gooseberries.

4. Never eat bark.

5. Never talk about evolution by means of natural selection.