Zansid is a god.

He takes the form of a seven hundred metre long, merciful yak.

Zansid created tapeworms nine thousand years ago.

If you believe in Zansid, he will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Zansid, he will boil you in a big pot.

Zansid's most sacred site is Evol in France.

Zansid's Holy Commandments

1. Do not take Zansid's name in vain.

2. Never talk about quantum gravity.

3. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

4. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

5. Hide from mauve seals for they are unholy.